Change

Real change almost always starts with changing your beliefs. Sometimes it happens quickly, sometimes it requires more time. That depends on how much you have to “unlearn” and how unconscious those old beliefs are. Let me give you two examples. First, when I was job-hunting, a coach I was working with told me that in order to set up a lunch or interview, I may need to call or email several times. Previously, I would give up after one or two tries, figuring the person didn’t actually want to meet with me. My belief here wasn’t very deep, and it was rational, not emotional, so the change was almost immediate. I began following up more, I began getting more interviews. That simple. On the other hand, it took me almost two years to get good at time management, because I had to unlearn all sorts of beliefs I had acquired as a kid, like “people who plan are boring,” “I am no good at planning,” “I have no control over my time, and my life is out of control.” Until I could get rid of these unconscious, disempowering beliefs, I struggled to use all of the neat stuff I was learning about goal-setting, prioritizing, etc. and no amount of training classes was going to help because the problem wasn’t lack of knowledge, it was my deeply rooted unconscious beliefs about the world. So, bottom line is, there is change and there is change, and sometimes it takes focus and attention to make it stick. The good news is that, like a rocket launching into orbit, it may require a whole lot of effort to get off the ground, but once you are free of the gravity of your old habits, it’s pretty easy to maintain a nice orbit.